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Snake Venom

I bought some cream for my face. It was on offer and I’m nearly forty.

Snake Venom, it said, will instantly freeze your wrinkles. I dropped it in my basket and moved on to the nappies and wipes.

Hang on, Snake Venom? Really?

Improved Formula with SYN-AKE, a snake venom-like peptide.

That sounds artificial, and toxic, but I really don’t want to look old.

Instant Effect Wrinkle Filler, for visibly smoother and plumper skin.

Mercury, Botulism, Leeches straight from Medieval Physick onto our twenty-first century faces.

Poison is the acceptable face of beauty.

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